The Heartbreak Of Achievement

One of my more talented students was denied admission to 2 of his favored colleges. You can imagine how he felt: rejected and dejected.

I see this scenario every year at this time, and my heart aches for these kids, but only because their dream school said, "No." I never really addressed this issue as much as I did today when I sent this note to, well, let's call him Chris.

My Dear Chris,

As much as I try to understand why talented students like you do not get accepted, you must recognize that you were not rejected. There is a HUGE difference. The awful reality is NOT knowing why you were not accepted, and if you called the schools to ask why, they would likely compliment you and add why they agonized immeasurably over your great application.

Your application wasn’t accepted because of factors you could not have known in advance, or more troubling, had no control over, such as…

• they already filled their quota of students from Massachusetts by the time your application was reviewed;


• they wanted more students this year whose parents never went to college;


• they slightly exceeded the amount of males they wanted;


• your interest level in the college wasn’t demonstrable enough; or


• they were looking for more “local” students because their own stats indicate that more money comes from alumni who are closer to their geographical location.

And you’re thinking, “This is just too odd! What’s all this got to do with my great grades and SAT scores? I met all their requirements!” I'll bet my house that you did, except for all the stuff you didn’t even imagine could be factored into why you were denied admission. With colleges that accepted you, you met and most likely exceeded their academic requirements, and you met all of their odd criteria too.

You're living your first college lesson in Irony 101.

So rejection was not the end result for you, and I hope you’re clear on this.

These criteria have nothing to do with your long hard efforts and achievements in these past 4 years, which were well recognized by those colleges that hope you show up in September. If you’re not sure by May 1 where to go, see my blog on how to avoid the pressure of May 1: http://www.precollegeprep.blogspot.com/ (See below.)

This is going to be easy for me to say, but I won’t assume you’ll easily accept the implications. Here it is: you’re talented, good colleges have accepted you, and you can move on with your life. Yeah…I know, thanks but no thanks.

But just in case you’re okay with what I’ve said so far, I found something on the net this morning that I thought you could use http://www.theadmissiongame.com/blog/archives/54

By the way, I’ll always be proud of the fact that I had you as one of my better students, which should signal to you that I have full confidence that the decisions you make and where you go will reflect commendably on who you are.

Paul